Monday, December 29, 2008

Feel like a girl again.

I bought myself a new pair of heels today!!

Probably none of you know that for the last two and a half years I have suffered from rheumatoid arthritis in both my hands and feet and lately in my ankles and knees and wrists. It came on suddenly, uninvited and it never left. I had to sell all my heels and cute shoes because walking was so horrifying to me and I became the tennis shoe queen. Or actually I wore the same pair every day because it is very hard for a person with wide feet and no arch to find a good pair of tennis shoes these days when the soles of your feet feel like they are comprised of shards of glass :(

About six months ago, I decided enough was enough. I was tired of being sloppy and tomboyish. I am a really girly girl. I love dresses and bows and pretty things. I love skirts and tights and heels. I know my ex got tired of seeing me in the same old outfit. I gained a ton of weight because I instantly stopped being active and I could no longer fit into pretty clothes or feel confident in my new fatter body. Also comfortable shoes are usually ugly, frumpy and look terrible with a skirt.

Today I was out to lunch with my mom and we passed by a Clark's shoe store. I asked her if she would go in with me, just to see and I tried on every heel in that store. They are SO comfortable! They have sturdy heels that do not bore holes into your heel. They have beautiful insoles that feel like heaven. And they have this retro feel to them. AND THEY WERE ON SALE!

I know they are just shoes, but I cannot explain my happiness. I feel pretty. I feel girly. I feel like I will get noticed and compliments. I can wear party clothes again. I can go out on New Years dressed appropriately. I can have church shoes and date shoes. And they look like the perfect mix between those booties I cannot wear and those high heeled oxfords I cannot wear.

My hands and feet hurt so much on a daily basis but I've learned to push through it by wearing sensible shoes and not pushing myself too hard. I'm tired of people thinking I'm sloppy and not girly and that I am boring and tire easily. It's totally corny but these shoes give me hope. That I can have fun, be stylish, wear the clothes I sell in my shop, and be lovely and feminine. It's corny, but I'm extremely happy :)

Behold. My newest obsession! Clark's Wimberley Pump!!!

Please don't tell me to clean my mirror. I am at my mom's house and it is my teenage brother's mirror. It doesn't even look dirty until the flash hits it.

And here is what I wore to go shopping today. The entire outfit is thrifted except for the cardigan which is forever 21. Imagine how much cuter the outfit would look with these reddish brown heels!


Torrie Smiley said...

Congratulations on your fabulous shoes! You made an excellent choice~ Best wishes from another high-heel shoe nut!


JodisCraftEmporium and More said...

those are gorgeous shoes. i totally have to be careful with what i wear on my feet also. I had double surgery on my left foot and single on my right. I can't wear narrow shoes at all which stinks. But I do have arthritis in my right knee really badly. But I work through it like you. So totally can relate to this post.

V. Morsse said...

Kudos for looking fab even without the heels. :D Do kitten heels hurt, too?

TheresaJ said...

Oh those are soooo cute! Congrats! I got a new pair of shoes today as well. Tried on a lot of Clarke's, but didn't see the ones you got, but ended up with a pair of Ciao Bella's. Really cute and yes, I feel girly too! :)

Sorry to hear about your RA. I know it can be so debilitating. My sister-in-law has it as well as one of my best friends, who is a dancer, massage therapist, and is EXTREMELY active, which she states helps her cope with the disease and keeps her moving and healthy. She always says that if she weren't so active, the disease would get the best of her.

Hope you had a lovely Christmas, and hope 2009 brings you all you hope for.

LadyRed said...

Congrats on those great booties!! It is never corny to find hope, even if it is in a pair of shoes! I hope 2009 brings you beautifully wearable shoes a'plenty!!

marci said...

Those are fabulous shoes! I am a fan of Clark's as well as Ariat, and Ecco. (Comfy shoes make all the difference.)

Forever Foxed said...

Oooo, love the shoes! Here's hoping that 2009 brings you all a girl could wish for. Happy New Year! J x

creativesundries said...

It's totally corny but these shoes give me hope....

Prudence, I don't think that's corny at all. It's awesome. I love it!

(found you on the etsy forum!)

Sarah :-)